Flirting secrets to win
Flirting is as much an art as making love. So when asked to write an article on flirting, it was hard not to feel a bit over the top. Flirting is the mating dance of showing our best features or feathers while attracting another; how well you flirt depends a lot on feathers, body language dance, and animal instincts. These are the essential key components to start the process of exchanging glances, then phone numbers, maybe kisses … well, you get the point.
Each person is a different type of animal in the flirting ritual, so it is important to stick to your true nature unless you are trying to date outside of your species. If you pretend to be someone and something that you are not, the answers you will get will be someone and something that will not work with who you really are. Sure you can play the role for a while if you’re the “gamer” type, but given enough time this choice is weakened as well.
Flirting means putting your best face, feathers, and foot forward. Bottom line; Looks matter, so wear clothes that highlight your best attributes and hide what’s missing like crazy. This is not necessarily the same as attracting your favorite actor or actress who was sporting on the cover of this month’s rave magazine. Sure spandex and hip huggers might work for some people, but neither should be made larger than a size 10. Avoid muffin tops like the plague. Dress appropriately for the location and only 2 degrees more edgy. For the more conservative, this can sometimes be done with an appropriate style appeal, but in a bolder color.
In rare cases, going too far is worth it. However, looking like a Kansas City hooker usually doesn’t work out all that well. Women, remember to keep makeup, especially lipstick. There is no better way to look faded than with dull, lifeless and abandoned lips. Tip: L’Oreal Infallible lipstick has exceptionally long wear and does not rub off. Men, go for the 6 o’clock shade and a classy dress or go with a more casual dress with a clean cut. Doing both casual and shady is a disaster. Too casual and you look like a mess. However, too clean a cut is much more difficult to spoil.
Subtle body language is more important to women than it is to men, as men are often the ones to approach. So women make approaching easier by not grouping all of their friends together like a pack of pack animals (which women are pack animals), being out of numbers can be intimidating. Men are hunters and, as we’ve all seen at Discovery Chanel, hunters go for the one that turns away from the ear.
There are hundreds of ways to make yourself more attractive in body language, most developed by the age of 13 and messed up soon after by ridiculous articles featuring this month’s best singles tips. Since one of the main points of this article is to be yourself, the only tips on the to-do list is to be happy, smile, have fun (but not too much), and be the best you can be. If you can’t do these things, it’s best to stay home and work to improve your life before opening the door to bring someone else into your life. If you are not happy with you, why should someone else be with you? Plus, there are some surefire ways to give anyone the “go away” vibe.
The list of dos and don’ts is more specific. Don’t turn your back on someone you are trying to attract. Don’t talk about anything unpleasant when you look their way. Your facial expressions will send out the wrong signals. Drink no more than 1 drink. That way you have something to do with your hands, you are a bit relaxed, and if you meet someone you can have one more drink with them, maybe exchange numbers, remember the law of scarcity and walk away. Don’t wear uncomfortable shoes no matter how good they look. If your feet hurt and you are in pain, you will look and walk like you are in pain, which is not attractive at all. Appearing in pain and despair are repellent. Again, if you’re desperate, work on your self-esteem before looking for that new love puppy. Not doing this is inviting more rejection and insecurity and making the problem worse.
Do not use perfume or colon. Artificial scents block natural attraction pheromones. You can sneak up on a real hottie, but if they smell like fruity tooty or (God forbid) your ex’s favorite fragrance, it will be a major distraction for the crucial 3 minute introductory phase that usually determines the outcome of the feather dance. .
